In love, quarrels are a natural thing to happen . Almost all couples must have been a fight, either because the matter small or because things were pretty serious. Launch of bustle, a therapy partner, Wendi L. Dumbroff, MA, LPC said, ” Differences in opinion and conflict will happen no matter how his love of the couple are. However, there are things that couples can do when facing difficulties, which can foster closeness.”
So, fighting does not always have a negative effect. However, there is the positive that can happen in a relationship romance that, as long as it is done in a healthy. Here are some tips that are expressed by couples therapy so that the fight is not prolonged.
1. Take a short break
“There is a difference between reaction to something and responding,” said Wendi. An effective way to deal with resentment, before a fight, is to take a short distance. Happens, when you are going to react with a sense of upset that , you could be thinking clearly .
2. Avoid uncovering the past
The easiest way to get a quick fight over is not to uncover the past. Couples will usually fight about the same thing, even though there are differences in resolving it. Avoidstoring sense of upset and make sure always resolve problems that occur when these.
3. Do not want to win themselves
All people have the nature selfish. When we are angry or emotionally stricken, sometimes we feel that we are the most right and the wrong partner. For that, we have to keep the emotion up first, listen to the explanation of the pair so that the problem that there is not protracted.
4. Avoid attacking your partner
Feeling annoyed is difficult to bury. Sometimes, our frustration becomes a weapon to attack a partner. Before the mutual blame, try to speak as well and be empathetic. This method can maintain the closeness of you and your partner, and help find solutions in solving these problems.
5. Forgive yourself alone
One of the steps is important to resolve the problem is to forgive. Important for you to forgive yourself alone or couples and not mutually blaming one each other. The process offorgiveness is indeed not easy, but how it can help you to learn mutual understanding of each other.